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Literature Text
"Hello... Is anybody there..."
As I was met with the usual static, I realized I wasn't even asking any more... simply talking out into the empty wavelengths.
It was four days since I saw the last flash, five since they started. I only caught a glimpse of the first one out the corner of my eyes, having been nose-deep in the latest research data. When I looked up all I saw were the clouds from the latest storm over the States. I figured it must have been a particularly powerful lightening strike and returned to my data on the monitor.
The next flash followed a couple of minutes later. Confused, I looked out the side of the station, this time keeping my attention on the atmosphere. It wasn't long till I saw a new flash, right on top of New York.
My mouth went dry in seconds. That was no lightening storm.
As the clouds seemed to bulge upwards over New York, a new flash lighted up the atmosphere, this time on the far eastern side of the planet.
It was night there.
And cloudless.
And the dark mushroom cloud stood in strong relief against the flash for a moment, before the light started to dull.
I lost count of the flashes as they spread out over the world.
It was all so horribly close and far away at the same time. I think my mind froze after the first handful flashes died out, incapable of encompassing the information my eyes were relaying. At some point, I even think I was so convinced I was dreaming that I simply went back to looking at the data blinking on my monitor. I didn't really understand any of the text, though, and before long, I was looking out the side of the station again.
When the flashes finally trailed off and stopped, most of the planet was covered in thick clouds.
I didn't touch the radio for the first couple of days, hoping, praying, that someone would radio me to tell me all was well.
When I finally did check on the radio, all I got was static.
And I was supposed to have been relieved in seven days.
As I was met with the usual static, I realized I wasn't even asking any more... simply talking out into the empty wavelengths.
It was four days since I saw the last flash, five since they started. I only caught a glimpse of the first one out the corner of my eyes, having been nose-deep in the latest research data. When I looked up all I saw were the clouds from the latest storm over the States. I figured it must have been a particularly powerful lightening strike and returned to my data on the monitor.
The next flash followed a couple of minutes later. Confused, I looked out the side of the station, this time keeping my attention on the atmosphere. It wasn't long till I saw a new flash, right on top of New York.
My mouth went dry in seconds. That was no lightening storm.
As the clouds seemed to bulge upwards over New York, a new flash lighted up the atmosphere, this time on the far eastern side of the planet.
It was night there.
And cloudless.
And the dark mushroom cloud stood in strong relief against the flash for a moment, before the light started to dull.
I lost count of the flashes as they spread out over the world.
It was all so horribly close and far away at the same time. I think my mind froze after the first handful flashes died out, incapable of encompassing the information my eyes were relaying. At some point, I even think I was so convinced I was dreaming that I simply went back to looking at the data blinking on my monitor. I didn't really understand any of the text, though, and before long, I was looking out the side of the station again.
When the flashes finally trailed off and stopped, most of the planet was covered in thick clouds.
I didn't touch the radio for the first couple of days, hoping, praying, that someone would radio me to tell me all was well.
When I finally did check on the radio, all I got was static.
And I was supposed to have been relieved in seven days.
My third step along my journey to 100.
Todays prompt: Static
I'm following Pencil-Wolf's
Todays prompt: Static
I'm following Pencil-Wolf's
100 Literature Prompts1. Oh poor Atlas
2. Artificial heart
3. Static
4. It's alive and it's beating
5. Hanging bones
6. Fleas
7. Red
8. Leather bound book
9. Flying fish
10. What happened to the colour?
11. Shadow box
12. Pinned wings
13. Cupcake pincushion
14. Paper crane
15. Consciously unconscious
16. Sick
17. Mental midgets
18. Flutter heart, you know you're not free
19. Steampunk boots
20. Grotesque
21. Umbilical cord
22. Collocation
23. Empty metaphors
24. Silver bullets
25. TV Dinners
26. Reverberating
27. Phantasmagoria
28. Reticent
29. Frowzy mousey hair
30. Wicker basket full of water
31. Uninhabited brain
32. pig-sticker
33. Floating archipelagos
34. Pockets full of four leaf clovers
35. Unloved puce
36. Quite unbecoming of you
37. Burn down the bridge
38. Absolution
39. Rememorate
40. Gilded superciliousness
41. Tommy gun ratta-tat-tat
42. Nettle
43. Devil on your back
44. Hymnal of the falling
45. Ghosts and mothballs in the closet
46. Clothes on the floor
47. Cockerel crow
48. Worry Worm
49. K
© 2015 - 2024 BreaghaDerryth
Comments4
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Overall Vision Originality
Technique ImpactI think you describe the events and situation well. I think you packed a lot of emotion into this short story, so I gave you a high ranking for impact. The second sentence is probably my favorite line of the entire story. I think you have an extra space between out and into, though.
There's only one other issues I see here.
"It was night there. And cloudless. And the dark mushroom cloud stood in strong relief against the flash for a moment, before the light started to dull." I don't mind "And cloudless", because it's a person thinking. However, the next sentence wouldn't have any choppiness and would have more emotional impact if you removed the "and" at the beginning. It reads awkwardly the way it is.
Other than that, I like the story a lot and I think you interpreted the prompt in a unique way.